Grasping the Love of God
So much of how we see the world is colored by our experiences, beliefs, desires, past and present relationships, and much more. This is also true for how we see God, for better and for worse. It can be a hindrance to really knowing God, the God who is love.
Last month I attended the annual meeting of the Evangelical Philosophical Society. We meet alongside the Evangelical Theological Society, which gives some great opportunities for learning from and engaging with scholars outside of philosophy. On the first day of the conference, I attended a session sponsored by the Eden Project on the primacy of the love of God. I’ve always struggled to experience and feel God’s love. It’s much easier for me to experience God as a harsh judge, as someone who puts up with me, rather than someone who actually likes and even loves me. It is easy for me to advise others about this, who struggle to believe that God loves them just as they are, but part of me resists or even rejects the reality of this love for me. I am sure that I’m not alone in this experience.
I’ve seen some progress over the years, and for that I am thankful. The deep love my wife of 30 years shows me on a daily basis, experiencing a love for our three daughters and realizing that this is but a small glimmer compared to God’s radiant love for people (including me), and longstanding friendships have helped the reality of God’s love permeate my soul, bit by bit. But I’m realizing again how my felt experience and view of God doesn’t match the reality of “how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ” and that large parts of me don’t really “know this love that surpasses knowledge” (Eph. 3:18-19).
What can be done about this?
We cannot just will a deeper grasp or experience of this reality into being. But we can open up our lives, in a variety of ways, making space for the Spirit to move. As I’ve reflected on this the past few weeks, several things come to mind that can be helpful here.
Begin by an intentional change of perspective. A good first step involves realizing that we may be seeing God as less or different than he is. While this won’t solve everything, a good start is realizing how our concept of God differs from God as he actually is. And we can intentionally try to see God as he is, allowing him to correct our misguided concept. This is a wonderful time of year to do this. Think about what kind of love compelled Jesus to become human, to come to this planet as a baby, voluntarily experiencing the limits of humanity by becoming one of us. As Bill Bright used to say, it is like one of us becoming an ant to save all the ants, but the difference between God and us is even more pronounced.
We need to be committed to a spiritually healthy and vibrant church. A church that in theory or in practice sees God as less than perfect love will struggle to help each other more fully grasp the love of God. A spiritually healthy and vibrant church is not a perfect church. No such place or body of believers exists. But a community of faith that centers the love of God in worship, teaching, service, and fellowship will, over time, be a place where people can grow to more deeply know and experience God’s love.
We need close spiritual friendships. This is a challenge in our society. The demands of work can get in the way. Our various activities, including religious activity, can prevent us from taking the time to develop, cultivate, and simply enjoy deep friendships with other followers of Jesus. But it is in those deep friendships that we tangibly experience the love of God in Christ, something Dietrich Bonhoeffer describes so well in his classic work, Life Together.
Other practices that can help. Time in silence and solitude can be a way of opening up our hearts and minds to God and his love. Studying, memorizing, and meditating on the words of Scripture can be formative here, too. And spiritual reading of books by those who have gone before us can give us the guidance we need to open ourselves up to the love of God in new and deep ways. For me, the works of Dallas Willard are meaningful. On the recommendation of a friend, I just started Frank Laubach’s Letters by a Modern Mystic, and am hopeful that it will be significant for me, too. Counseling can be certainly be useful as well.
As we enter the Advent season, why not pick one or two practices to commit to, so that we can more fully experience and know the love of God? Not only will this be good for us, it will also enable us to offer that love to others in a world that desperately needs it.
Thanks, Mike. As always, appreciate your reflections.